It is a sad day of mourning here at Fisch School of the Arts. Just yesterday evening, the exciting news was announced that Pablo Pescado would be a featured artist at ITP’s winter show, exhibiting his groundbreaking techniques in the swimpressionist arts. Pescado was clearly flooded with joy. However, the pressures of his newfound celebre proved too strong for little Pablo.
It is with a heavy heart that I announce that at 12:31 am last evening, the great artist Pablo Pescado was pronounced dead from unknown causes. Suicide by binge eating is suspected (it was a well known fact that Pescado did not always know his limits), however foul play has not been ruled out; Pescado had many admirers, but also several rivals who were envious of his talents.
As his agent, I am left with no alternative but to spend coming days floundering to find a substitute. Thankfully, Pablo is survived by his school of promising young proteges (including the highly esteemed Vincent van Goldfish, Leonardo da Fishy, and Sandro Bettacelli, among others), whose work I am currently filtering through. Pablo would have certainly wanted it that way.
We will never forget his important contributions to the art world. Rest in peace, Pablo. The memory of your work will perhaps outlast even your own memory…which was said to have been quite short.



